A near Jailhouse Rock! – Md Zawi (LAISI) the White Knight & The Bowling Queen

What an exciting morning I’ve had today – I was almost sent to the Pengkalan Chepa Prison to be remanded until Feb 11! And this is not a joke.

Yes, I’m seeing things in a different light now – and having a few laughs about it in fact. However, it wasn’t so at around 9.30 AM this morning – in fact my heart was thumping! Well, who wouldn’t when he has just been ARRESTED, and would have been sent to remand had he not been bailed out.

And remand in Kelantan means that dreaded prison… (Click for an account of my three-month experience there in 2005) Just picture this: Some officers would certainly have known about that piece, which had painted that prison in a not-so-flattering way. They’d certainly have wondered who the writer is…

And there might have been some inmate, keen to `bodek’ the officers for some favours, might have helpfully mentioned this: “Oh, I remember there was one guy who seemed to know English…And he was sent to Gambang. I think they called him Cxxgx, from Pasir Mas… thin guy, gaunt face, wears spectacles…”

Okay, how did I get into this mess today? It’s like this: I had failed to attend a hearing at the Syariah Court last Dec 31.

“What was the case about, Mat Cendana? Say, were you caught in a `Khalwat’ situation with some `janda’? Must be-lah Heheh!” [NOTE: I consider it’s “Mat Cendana” of Cendana Blues  writing this post; and NOT the “Cendana287” who had written the other posts at this particular blog]

Well, what the case was is not too important – those who know, know; and I’m okay with that. In fact, two people here know “almost 100%” of it and more. BUT I won’t delve into it here; either to defend myself or whatever. Anyway, the issue here is – it was the second time in four previous hearings that I had failed to attend… AND without “good excuse” this time.

The first time (end of Ramadhan, I think); I had phoned the court a few minutes before it started to inform that I “was sick”. But I didn’t go out to get a medical certificate, even though my father had advised me to when I told him about it. Well, nothing happened after that; although I must have created a bad impression on the judge. But I did attend the following one; and nothing was mentioned about my non-appearance before that, Phew!

I can’t really explain why I didn’t attend the one on Dec 31. It’s natural that some might suspect me as “of having a bad attitude”. Maybe. But I don’t think so, honestly. In fact, at least four people here can verify that I had made serious preparations for the appearance. And one of them is a lawyer (No, it’s not Elviza Michele of Write Away this time).

But I didn’t go… And this was the key ingredient to the “Cause and Effect Principle” of this morning.

I was already prepared with everything that morning. But “it felt heavy” (don’t ask, because I can’t explain). At 7.45 AM, I made a decision – I didn’t want to go. Had contacted my “top advisor/critic” (yes, it’s her) about it – someone genuinely sympathetic to me and my causes.

Anyway, I had waited for the court to send a “warning letter” and also to fix the next date. I didn’t receive one – I only knew about it when `someone’ came over to inform me about it less than 10 minutes after I had sent in the previous “Stargazer” post. I was fuming – at such short notice! It was “sabotage”! But then, what can I say about my own previous action of not attending?

Well, it was a call to “my top advisor” yet again. This is getting predictable, I know… And/But it also shows my very high level of “trust” for her and Mie. Plus, a check-and-balance “with level-headed and reasonable people” – something I have never had previously (and making a lot more bad decisions then). And I’m grateful to God for having people who care enough to help me weigh and evaluate things. Sherry was down with heavy flu (I felt real bad about troubling her today; I really do)

She confirmed and strengthened what I had intended to do: Go to the court despite the very short notice (8.30 AM to report) – Less than 45 minutes to get ready; plus the waiting for public transport to town about 5 miles away. Fortunately, a pirate van operator passed along, and I wasn’t too late by arriving at 8.40 AM.

**TO BE CONTINUED. Part 2The Trial (Incidentally, a song by Pink Floyd from “The Wall”) Oh, don’t worry about the “Continued” – it’s “immediately” (Which also means “If nothing interrupts – like cari makan work”). Mohd Zawi intends to blog too, and I’m sending in this one first so he won’t be too delayed. I hope it’s fair and reasonable for the loyal readers here.

***UPDATE:  Mohd Zawi has provided a hilarious account of it at one of his blogs,  LAISI, in the  I Thought It Would Be An Uneventful Today post.


16 thoughts on “A near Jailhouse Rock! – Md Zawi (LAISI) the White Knight & The Bowling Queen

  1. Ahah! Firsthand, original story!
    Ye lah, you gave wrong ideas to the judge already maa…not good for you, I’m pretty sure~~
    Aww screw it. This is rather funny, combining both yours and Pak Zawi’s take, but you should not have this kind of adventure too often lah hahaha :D

  2. @Pak Zawi @Akmal
    Bang Zawi, Sherry SMS me just now – she was having a good laugh with your post. I’m glad when she’s happy; especially when I’ve troubled her so much at a time when she’s having flu and a fever. Some brother I am… Sigh.

    And it doesn’t matter which one is funnier or what – Like I had said to you you about this episode: Since it had ended so well, let’s just see the humorous side of it. And it’s obvious that there are many things to laugh about when we don’t take ourselves too seriously.

    I’m taking the advice of someone from Facebook (Has Hanie Bahari) – to make sure there’s at least one humorous thing that we see each day – AT LEAST. If not, then that day “was not lived”… we had wasted it. Well, since you and I are “semakin tua”, and are nearing our “pre-paid credit, whatever years God has Decreed”, let’s make the most use of each day. Sensible and logical dak, Bang Wi?

    Akmal: Ish, jangae la dok buak negative gitu! Putuh angin pulok nok fight next month Heheh!

    Actually, I had listened to Bang Zawi’s take on this – It’s likely true that the judge does not have a good impression of me due to my “don’t give two hoots to authorities and The Law” by absenting TWICE (not consecutively though – ni kerja oghe gila lah). So, my mistake and fault here. Okay, have to change that. How? I’m thinking…

    But you know what? By adopting this “don’t be too serious”, my mind is quite at peace right now. I can say this for certain: This experience has actually resulted in the POSITIVE for me! How, Where?… I’ll point them out in Part 2. And I have Bang Zawi as witness as to whether I’m right, or whether I’m kidding myself… LATER

  3. don’t take lightly what the judge might give you next time round,,,,perhaps you might plead partial insanity or something to be left off lightly ?.
    Take it easy but not too easy sampai terlupa next callout.
    If its with ex-wife issue better try to solve it out of court,,,,,via a lawyer friend of yours,,,, to keep cost to minimum better if free-lah.
    Nak campur hal peribadi bukan kerja saya but ,,,,,but friend like you need a hand at times or else can go hay wire with your own logic. Kalau kita boleh tolong with free advise why not yaa,,,,???.
    My sincere advise,,,,don’t get carried away-lah,,,, o.k brother !,,,,,THEy are after your ass, belief me, so be very careful and keep in line with the Law.
    Syariah Court nowadays,,,if not careful, will cut off your balls,,,HUDOH you baru tau hahaha.

  4. @Ija
    That’s really nice to know, Thanks.
    BTW I did better than what I had told you at Facebook – that Part 3 was sent in early in the morning.

    This one is “a bonus”- I didn’t expect to write another one today. But with this one, I MUST… else I’ll get tense from the stress and tension. At least now when I laugh it off (and Zawi too), I actually feel at peace and optimistic. I could easily have felt anger, resentment and feelings of vengeance instead.

    There’s a continuation – I had intended to write immediately. But was stuck with other things… kena buat dulu. And then must reply to “my fellow SAHC 70’s” at previous post. Tired right now. But I’ll try. Boleh pecah rekod – THREE posts here in a day. And as you know, my posts aren’t “250 words” kind Heheh! But the important thing is – I want and like to do it, it is useful to me, readers like to read it, useful to them… This is crucial.

  5. @Capt
    No, not really that one…
    Actually, on MY part, I want to settle this out of court, definitely. And I had said so previously AND today. Fortunately, no lawyers are involved – both parties are willing to risk things based on their own ignorance of the law. And i say that’s fair enough.

    And this “lawyer friend”- YES, I owe her one! Had asked her about a number of things, and she had happily offered me real EXPERT opinion. I’m touched by this kind of people who are not mercenary.

    You must know the kind, I’m sure – always with a sharp eye to charge for something; anything. NOTE: Don’t ask this kind “what time is it” – might be billed RM50 for that.

  6. Bro Mat C

    Please take care. It is really good that both you and Zawi have such an excellent sense of humour about your mini-adventure (not forgetting Sherry’s vital role in saving your ass from the magistrate’s wrath).

  7. @de minimis

    Dal, you probably need not have to worry about such things. From my observations and experiences, this type of thing usually happens “to a certain kind” (myself definitely included) – the type that has the inclination “to take risks”. Plus, the type that frequently fails to be prudent, to adopt and adapt preventive measures etc in various aspects of their lives – THEY HAVE IT COMING.

    I admit that I was quite nervous immediately after I was detained – with visions of Pengkalan Chepa Prison. However, “past experiences” had helped me with this situation. “What experiences”? Well, things like having seen the insides of four police lockups and two prisons over the years are actually useful “when the experiences and knowledge gained are properly utilised”.

    Anyway, I must stress that yesterday’s drama later turned out to be beneficial to me! How? Hold on, I’ll write the Part2 post now, despite “the work scheduled on Thursday” that I actually must start doing.

    But Part 2 is also important – I had told Elviza by sms last night that “it would be ready this morning when she wakes up”. Unfortunately, I got “tied up” with other things. Sorry, Elviza. But I’ll make it up RIGHT NOW.

    Stay Tuned for Part 2. After that, I can fully concentrate on that weekly “Thursday Deadline” thing…

  8. Dear All,
    MC and me were trying to beat each other to see who could post first. I experienced a blackout when my notebook shutdown after the battery was exhausted and I had to redo those parts that was not saved. So he beats me to it. We were looking at the same thing from two different perspectives. Via SMS communication we decided to treat it with a slight humour. It was easier for me to do it that way as I wasn’t the one who was to be remanded.

  9. Dearest MC,

    When i received your msg in FB my bulu roma all tegak!! then i thought if you managed to sent me a msg then u must be ok.. tapi unsangkarable la pulak your mini adventure is a risky adventure..

    Anyhow, it’s good that you can see the funny side of your adventure and made Pak Zawi terketor-ketor.. but pls pls pls do go to your court appointment on the 11th.

    If you miss that again, i bet (you know me and my bet RIGHT????) that tons of your frens in here would personally go to Kelantan and find you and start to verbally balun you till you cant take it anymore… So you better attend k…

    Anyhow, do take care.. will msg soon!!!

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